Adventures in Potty Training

As our son approaches the 2 1/2 year mark, we have decided to step up our efforts with regard to potty training. I know that boys take longer than girls, or so I've been told, and I'm not in any way concerned that he isn't or pushing him to be... I am just 100% done with diapers. Diaper rash, day diapers vs. overnight diapers, convincing him to lay still for 30 seconds to be changed- I'm just done with the whole process.

Now, he has been interested in the potty for about a year. We have a very snazzy potty that plays music when you use it successfully, which at the time I thought, "Great! That will be fun and he will feel rewarded. We'll be potty trained in no time!" Even Nathan is tired of the musical component of the potty by now, and has mastered turning the sound on and off to his liking. We've tried rewarding him with M&M's. We started with 1 for trying, 2 for a Number 1, and 3 for a Number 2. Little con artist... next thing we new he was copping 4 or 5 M&Ms at a clip, asking both Mommy and Daddy separately for his reward! I put my foot down the one evening and explained that if there's no potty action, there's no treat. He marched into the bathroom, sat down, and I swear willed it to happen. We're talking 4-5 drops, but in the interest of consistency... here come the M&Ms for successes big and small.

So we've done it all. Big potty vs. little potty. Sitting vs. standing. He's all over the map. Which brings us to last night. As is our ritual, before bath we march into the bathroom to make an attempt at the potty. He sits down on his toddler potty, and I sit down across from him and prepare to try and be entertaining. This is a fine line, as I need to be entertaining enough to keep him on the potty, but not so entertaining that he forgets why we're there. I read our "trying potty" book- no luck. At this point, he announces he'd like to try the big potty... standing. Now, at less than 3 feet tall and not having too much experience with going standing up, I'm certain this is not going to be a match. So, we get a stool for him to stand on. As I'm setting us up for attempt #2, he asks very sweetly if I'll wear his fireman's hat. No, I'm not sure why there is a fireman's hat in our bathroom, but as I am distracted with the whole stool set up I say yes. Once we're all settled, he steps up to the plate, and asks for the story just one more time. So here I am, sitting in my bathroom floor, wearing a children's plastic fireman's hat, reading "If you give a moose a muffin" aloud, holding my son's hand for his balance, and hoping for some potty action.

Sadly, no action was to be had. When the story was over, he happily climbed down from the stool and announced he was ready for his bath. He very sweetly reminded me that we could "try again after my baf." Good thing I can rock that hat.

Wedding Wonderings: The Favor of Your Reply...

The ceremony and reception locations have been reserved. Times are set. Vendors have been hired. Now it's time to get some guests! Many couples find that creating, and finalizing, the guest list are two of the most difficult parts of wedding planning. The bride has her list, the groom has his list, and the parents all have their friends to invite as well. Consolidating all of these names into a workable guest list that will fit inside Raven's Stadium can be a challenge, never mind getting down to a regular reception site size!

Here are a few rules of thumb to get you started:
1. Decide how many guests you hope to have at the wedding, and then divide it up from there. For example, we'd like to invite 180, so 60 guests for the bride and groom, 60 guests for the parents of the bride and 60 guests for the parents of the groom to start off. From there, let the trading and bartering begin!
2. If your parents are paying for the wedding, let them invite their friends. It's not worth the argument, typically, to try and block out a few guests that you'll only have to say a quick "hello" to before returning to the dance floor.
3. Do not invite more than your reception site can hold. If you invite 250 guests, you are not guaranteed that the average 20% will regret bringing you down to your venues 200 guest max. No one wants to have to decide who will have to eat rooms away because they won't fit in your ballroom.
4. It is not necessary for your fiances "single and looking to mingle" friends to all bring dates. Perhaps one of your nice single friends would be a good match and their no date status will allow them to meet!
5. Have some general guidelines that apply to all parties. Ex. If we haven't met them in real life, we don't want them to come to the wedding OR If they didn't invite us to theirs, we aren't inviting them to our.
And most importantly 6. Proceed with care and love. You will all be family once all this wedding craziness is behind you, and you don't want this experience to leave a bad taste in anyone's mouth.

There is actually no need to invite everyone you ever met to your wedding. This is a very intimate and special day for the two of you and your families, and it commemorates the start of your new life together. Have as many of your friends and families as you'd like, but know that there are very few people you "have to" invite. In most cases, with a few exceptions, the attendance or omittance of any one guest will not make or break the success of your day.

If there are specific guests that you would especially like to have in attendance, or guests traveling from far away, it is always nice to send a Save the Date Card. My friend Amanda at http://doiliesanddaisies.etsy.com/ and http://dawncorrespondence.etsy.com/ helps couples to create fun custom Save the Dates and Invitations. Particularly with the, Save the Dates, it's a great opportunity to inject a little personality into your correspondence. Ask about coordinating all your wedding correspondence from Save the Dates through to the Thank Yous!

I especially recommend sending out Save the Date Cards if you are planning a destination wedding, a holiday wedding (4th of July, Memorial Day, and Labor Day Weekends are all popular for both weddings and other social plans) or another potential conflict (think major events- marathons, concerts, conventions). That way they can get hotel accomodations (if needed) and travel plans in place before they book up! And remember, you can send someone an invitation that didn't get a Save the Date, but you can't send someone a Save the Date but not an invitation! XOXO

Thank you, baby...

This morning we had a minor moment, when my son burst into tears over an injury. While playing in his room, instead of getting his coat on, he stepped on the lamp cord in his room. This cord runs down under his bedside table and straight into the wall, meaning that if he stepped on it, the table is no longer where it belongs. "On the plug end?" I asked in horror, but he assured me it was on the long flat part. The lamp remained plugged in. "And you fell?" I asked again, searching for bruises or other wounds. "No" he replied. So... now I'm confused. "So what happened after you stepped on the chord?", I asked now, starting to doubt that this was the tragedy I had originally been lead to believe. "Nofing," he said, "I came a get my coat on and tell you."

After a tearful telling of the tale, and a thorough assessment of the foot in question, it was determined that the injury was, in fact, imagined. After several kisses to the bottom of his foot, the redressing of sock and shoe, he was ready to march to the door and out into the world. As he slid out of the chair he looked at the floor between it and the wall and said, "Eww, Mommy! It's dirty down there. We need a bacuum." Left with no words I just smiled and said, "Thank you, baby," took his hand and lead him to the door.

I'll also note that despite said incident, I was thrilled that all three of us paraded out the door on time to the minute. We were armed and ready to face the day ahead, and we were do it fairly happily on this (finally) warm day. We got into our cars and pulled of in our individual directions to seize the day. Too bad no one remembered it was trash day...

Easter Egg Olympics

We're in training, people! Now that the winter Olympics are over, my son has been exploring other competitive outlets. We've played "Run and Tackle", where I sit in the floor, we both have footballs, and then he runs at me as fast as he can, knocking me flat and yelling "Touchdown!" complete with the requisite hands over head. We've jumped on the couch, the trampoline, and the bed. Now he has settled on preparing for the family Easter egg hunts.

Being the youngest cousin on one side of his family, and the second youngest on the other, he will have to really prepare to compete this year. We are, again on both sides, competitive by nature and feisty with it. Last year he just ran around and around while the other kids hunted eggs... the purpose of the game lost on him. This year, with a little coaching from Mom Mom, he is feeling primed and ready! We've been playing "Easter Eggs" every day since she introduced the game last Saturday, and I must say he is getting very good.

This year he has also discovered that some of the eggs contain... wait for it... candy! Last year, because his mother can be a little lame, most of his eggs were filled with Cheerios. The realization that finding an egg could lead to M&Ms or even better, Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, has absolutely added to the allure. He is now a man on a mission, chomping at the bit while we hide them and bursting into the room when we are done like a prized Thoroughbred out of the starting gate.

So watch out family, here he comes! He is primed and ready and anxious to start... the hunt is on!

Wedding Wonderings: First Things First

In our second wedding feature, it seems best to start at the beginning. Inevitably, the first thing that friends and family ask a newly engaged couple is "Have you set a date?". This seemingly innocent inquiry brings lots of couples feelings of anxiety that they are already behind the 8 ball moments after getting engaged. This is, of course, crazy.

The first step in wedding planning should not be selecting a random date out of thin air, and then embarking on an exhausting search for a site with that specific day open. That is how you end up in a big hotel ballroom, while 2 other weddings are also going on, when what you really wanted was something intimate, private, and historic. It is far easier, less stressful, and efficient to start by researching sites that appeal to you, and then sort out the date from there. By all means, have a preferred season, but if 10/10/10 isn't available don't let that derail your search.

If you don't already have a sense of what style of venue appeals to you, I would recommend trying on several different options. Go see a mansion, go see a hotel, go see a country club... the worst that can happen is you'll hate it and you'll leave. There's no commitment in visiting, and you may discover that something not originally on your radar is the perfect fit.

Which brings up another good point... there is no perfect location. There is, however, a location that is perfect for you. Focus on your big picture, not the color of the tile in the bathroom. Selecting a venue is very much like selecting the dress or the groom... when you know, you know. If you can see yourself having your first dance in the ballroom, or being toasted by your Uncle Bob from the 2nd floor landing, or it just feels like "you"... go with it. Your wedding day is about the two of you as a couple, and you are what will make is special and unique and yours. Be open to lots of options, enjoy the fun of exploring the area and the many sites it offers, and allow yourself to embrace the adventure of this first step in your new lives together.

Food Lion Vs. Football

The other night, I was lamenting the need to go to the grocery store on the way home from work. I arrived at daycare at just 2 minutes shy of the deadline, so while I wasn't officially late, it would be good to be quick in our departure so they can have dinner too. I got Nathan all psyched up about going to the store without using a shopping cart, a treat reserved for when we need less than 5 things. As anyone with a two year old will tell you, embarking on a shopping adventure without the confines if a cart is a risky endeavour, but with my little man convinced he is a big boy we dare to try it every so often.

I called my husband to say we would be a few extra minutes as a result of our side trip, and was thrilled to hear that he was actually in the parking lot of Food Lion to make an unrelated purchase for himself. He offered to pick up what we needed while he was there, and just like that we were on our way directly home. As I contemplated tears of joy, I heard a wail rise up from the back seat. Upon seeing our house, Nathan burst into tears, sobbing "I'nna go to da Food Lion!" Much to my surprise, he was devastated that our planned field trip would not be happening.


He cried while I took in my purse. He cried while I took in his diaper bag and the mail. He stood on the front lawn and cried while I locked up the car and tried to coax him inside. In my rapidly increasing frustration that we got home early, only to spend all that time crying in the front yard, I said, "Nathan, what do you want to do instead of going to Food Lion?" He replied, "I'nna play football!"

So, there we were when my husband pulled into the driveway. Nathan in his sweats and tennis shoes, and me in my dress clothes and 3 inch heals, playing football in the front yard. There was tackling aplenty, the touchdowns were many, and the victory dances were impressive for all the neighbors to see. And sure enough as soon as Daddy held out his hand, Nathan dutifully took it and marched proudly into the house, football under his arm. Once we were in and settled, Eric looked at me and said, "I don't get it... why are you playing football outside all dressed up?" Excellent question, my love, excellent question...

It's a Glamorous Job...

I received a stressed out email from a client late yesterday indicating her need for a challah at her event this evening. I replied "Not to worry", I would happily pick up a challah for her and have it at the mansion at the appropriate time. After completing my new appointment tours for the day, I gathered my things and headed to the local Giant to secure the bread.

I am amazed by how different two Giants can be mere 10 miles or less apart. After finally locating a sales clerk and getting directions to the bakery I found a virtual challah buffet. Plain whole, plain sliced, sesame seed, poppy seed... I was set! Ironically, the one near my house may or may not have had challah at all. Good thing I didn't stop there on the way home last night, as I had intended.

I get in line at the self-check line. There is one women in front of me and lines everywhere else, so I decide to pick this lane and wait. What I failed to realize at this time is that this woman had a full cart of groceries, had never self-checked before, and had BO that made my eyes tear. She would forget to scan her bonus card, need to rescan several items, and require the help of an "associate"... twice. I felt like I was trapped in the opening to Office Space, where every lane turns to the slow lane as soon as he moves over to it... and his old lane takes off.

I did get my challah, and get it back to work in plenty of time. It was a 35 minute adventure, 3 blocks from my work. It's a glamorous job, I know.